Peter's Letters
6 - Husbands and Wives
We’re near the end of 1 Peter 2. Christ, the sinless One, could have escaped it all – the awful weals and wounds made in the body of Jesus by those dreadful whips. Instead,” when they hurled their insults at Him, He did not retaliate; when He suffered, He made no threats. Instead, He entrusted Himself to Him who judges justly” (verse 23). He committed Himself to the tender care of His loving Father. Jesus let His Father settle the account.
Peter states, “He Himself bore our sins in His body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by His wounds you have been healed” (verse24). The sins of untold myriads meet on Him. Because the stripes fell thick and heavy on Him, they need never fall on us. Peter writes, “For you were like sheep going astray, but now you have returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls” (verse 25). In the Old Testament the sheep died for the shepherd. At Calvary the Shepherd died for the sheep. Is He your shepherd? Is He your overseer? The word means the guardian and watchman of our souls. Are you a member of the Shepherd’s flock by repentance and faith?
Chapter 3 addresses husbands and wives. Some have wondered why the advice given to wives is six times as long as that given to husbands. This is not sexism. The wife’s position was far more difficult. If a man became a Christian, his wife would automatically follow him to church, for a woman had no rights at all. But for a wife to change her religion, while her husband did not, was unthinkable. He’d remain faithful to the ancestral gods, but what if she became born again?
Now she must play her cards carefully. Peter says, in effect, be a good wife. You can’t nag him into the kingdom, nor can you drag him into the kingdom, but you can live such a lovely, Christ filled life in your own home with your pagan husband that he’ll want what you’ve got.
Peter, who took his wife with him when he travelled (1 Corinthians 9:5), teaches that submission is the path to true beauty and true spirituality. Christian wives are not called to be holy doormats, but their godly behaviour will not go unnoticed. The unsaved husband may be tough to live with, but he isn’t blind. He can’t ignore the pure and reverent behaviour of his believing wife. This silent preaching of the sheer loveliness of her holy life will break down the barriers. Peter insists that internal beauty is more important than external adornments. ‘The unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit is of great worth in God’s sight’ (verse 4). True beauty is spiritual, your inner self, the hidden person of the heart. Some may think I’d gladly live like that, if I had the right kind of husband. This instruction is for the wife who has the wrong kind of husband.
How did the holy women of the past, who put their hope in God, make themselves beautiful? They were submissive to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master (verses 5- 6). The headship of the husband is not dictatorship, but a loving exercise of divine authority. Peter writes “Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives” – do we, as men, tend to be inconsiderate? – “and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers” (verse 7). Husbands and wives have different roles but they have equal spiritual rights as ‘fellow heirs of the gracious gift of life’. It was such a liberating truth Paul had taught the Galatians: “There is ... neither male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus … heirs according to the promise” (Galatians 3 verses 28 to 29).
Verse 8 deals with how believers interface with the world at large. In an age of selfish individualism we are to avoid slipping into a survival of the fittest mentality. Peter writes, “Live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble”. Sympathy and selfishness can not co-exist. Compassion or pity is in danger of becoming a lost virtue. Compassion has been explained as ‘everything within me goes out to him or her.’ Humility, so despised by the Greeks, was to be prized by the Christians. This does not mean ‘putting ourselves down’ but rather it is a willingness to take second place and put others first.
Believers are not to retaliate or give as good as they get. Moffatt translates verse 9 as “This is your vocation, to bless and to inherit blessing.”
Do you love life or do you wish it were over? Have you indulged in the death wish? Peter quotes from Psalm 34 verses 12 to 16 some interesting words – “Whoever would love life and see good days” must do three things – ‘keep his tongue from evil and his lips from deceitful speech;’ ‘turn from evil and do good;’ ‘seek peace and pursue it.’ Verse 12 is well worth meditating. “The eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and His ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”
Peter asks “Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed” (verses 13 and 14). Listen, Christian, you know that you’re not going to escape suffering in this world, if you’re a child of God. Whatever happens, you’re going to be blessed, provided you’re suffering for the right. The suffering Christian must ever remember he follows a suffering Lord.