Aspects of Loneliness
"WATCHING HER SON DIE!"
In this series of studies we have been looking at some of the occasions in the Bible when men and women suffered from an intense sense of loneliness. There were very few who knew the depths of this emotion more than Mary, the mother of Jesus. In this study we will see that she knew this loneliness at different stages of the life of Jesus: At His Birth, His Boyhood, His Manhood and His Death. These four incidents make fascinating reading, and we will call them - Misgiving, Misunderstanding, Misjudging and Mistreating. First:
Misgiving ... Life is full of surprises! We lay our plans and look forward with great excitement to seeing them fulfilled, then, in a moment of time, everything changes and what was to have been a high spot in our lives becomes a time of great uncertainty and frustration.
Can you picture the utter loneliness of a young Jewish woman, engaged to be married, and looking forward to the occasion with great joy, being told by an angel that the Holy Spirit was going to conceive, without any human involvement, and the baby to be born would be the Son of God? Imagine how she would explain that to her fiancé, to her parents and to her friends. No doubt there would be disbelief and disappointment; followed by blame and a demand to know the truth. Even those who loved her deeply would be inclined to say "These things don't happen; there must be a man involved, and if that man is not her fiancé, she must have been unfaithful to him."
What loneliness would grip her heart! Yet, as we read in Luke 2.38, her response was one of obedience to the Will of God "Behold the maidservant of the Lord! Let it be to me according to your word." What an antidote for loneliness; what a challenge and example for us! This experience is quickly followed by a special greeting from her cousin "Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb." God will not leave us in our loneliness...He will always be faithful.
Some 12 years later, Mary had another, quite different, experience of loneliness, recorded in Luke chapter 2, which we will call...
Misunderstanding ... Jesus had gone up to the Passover at Jerusalem with Joseph and Mary, and aspilgrims they travelled in a large caravan of friends and relatives. It would be quite natural, therefore, to assume that the 12 year old boy was with one of their extended family; but when he was obviously not in their party, Mary's heart would be full of fear. You can picture her and Joseph on the long trek back to Jerusalem, wondering if they would ever see Him again. When eventually they found Him in the Temple in Jerusalem it was also natural for Mary to relieve her pent-up anxiety in a gentle reprimand: "Son, why have you done this to us?"
Notice how the writer, Luke, comes to the climax of the story. As the learned rabbis listened to the questions of Jesus with astonishment, they were further amazed by His reply to Mary: "Didn't you know that I had to be in my Father's house?" These religious leaders would know from the scriptures that no king or prophet had ever referred to the tabernacle or the temple as "My Father's house." It's not surprising that Mary and Joseph "Didn't understand what He was saying", but it would increase their sense of loneliness! There is a lovely little touch in verse 51 where we read that, "Mary treasured these things in her heart." As she did so I am sure that her loneliness would quickly disappear!
Our next little cameo comes in Luke 8...
Misjudging ... As Jesus was teaching a great crowd of people, some of those closest to Him told Jesus that His mother and brothers wanted to see Him. He replied: "My mother and brothers are those who hear God's Word and put it into practice." They must have felt very "shut-out." Here was Mary's son not making time for His own mother! Once again she must have felt very lonely. But she was the one who was misjudging, for Jesus had commenced His public ministry, and His statement made it very clear that His over-riding concern was obedience to the Word of God.
We are not told how Mary handled this problem, but I think she would take His message to heart, and she would quickly go back to God's Word for her comfort and encouragement. This is always the real antidote for loneliness:- "Hearing or knowing the Word of God, and putting it into practice."
Our final incident is one that would touch the hardest heart and I have called it...
Mistreating ... There are few experiences in life which are harder to cope with than watching a loved one die. As I give this message I have just buried my wife whom I loved dearly, and to whom I was married for over fifty years, so the sense of loss and loneliness is very real. But thank God she died peacefully, and I have the glad assurance that she is with Christ.
If a loved one's death is caused by the brutality of men, then it becomes extremely difficult to bear. When Mary saw her Son suffer an agonising death upon the cross her whole world must have fallen apart. She would have known that one of His friends had betrayed Him and His closest friends had deserted Him. She may well have known that even Peter had denied that he ever knew Him. She would certainly have known the harshness and torture of the lashings and the buffeting, the taunts of the crowd, the ridicule of the religious leaders.
She took her place at the foot of the cross, as her son, whom she knew to be the Son of God, died upon a Roman gibbet. What loneliness must have filled her heart! She might well have questioned God's dealings with her. Her thoughts would be in turmoil. Was this all one big tragedy or did God have a purpose in it? Perhaps her mind would go back to the prophecy of Simeon "A sword will pierce your own soul also." She had not understood it at the time, as the godly man took the babyJesus in his arms and blessed Him. Now she could see that this was the very day which Simeon had foretold. Then she would recall Simeon's other words, and they would bring comfort to her heart "My eyes have seen your salvation...a light to lighten the Gentiles and the glory of your people Israel." Yes, God had His purpose even in the mistreatment of her son upon the cross!
Are you experiencing loneliness right now? Are you filled with fear as you face a most difficult situation all on your own? Well, I've got good news for you! God wants to come right into that situation with you, bringing you comfort, peace and a real sense of His Presence! Will you turn to Him in faith today? It will make all the difference.